Shey B

November 3, 2015
by shealynn


Have your thoughts ever made you cry? I mean you’re sitting down thinking, and your thoughts just keep on spiraling around and around, getting bigger and bigger with each passing moment and before you know it, you’ve got tears streaming down your face?

That happened to me today. I was sitting at my dining table having lunch with Brooke & Mason. They were babbling to themselves and before I knew it, I was thinking about life. It all started because I bought Mason underwear today. haha! Something so minor sparked this major spiral of emotional doom in my mind.

Growing up my mom took us to church. She told us all about the love of God and we learned that Jesus died on the cross for our sins. I believe that to this day. However. When I was 19 I started dating my husband. I was going to church back then. In fact, I was working at a church. My husband is agnostic. Mike (my husband) made me a “love at first sight” believer. I don’t know what it was about him, but as soon as I saw him, it was just instant. But it wasn’t that way with my parents nor was it that way with my friends at the time. As soon as my friends found out he wasn’t a christian, they began judging him. Harshly. And judging me. And before I knew it, all my friends had vanished. Because of that, I stopped going to church. Maybe that makes be insane, or petty. But even now looking back, I get it. I get why I stopped going to church. I’ve been a few times in the past 15 years but I don’t go often. And since I’m getting really honest, I don’t want to go. Some of the harshest most judgmental people I’ve come across are “Christians”. Telling me I’m not a true christian because I don’t attend church. Telling me that I no longer can believe because I don’t study my bible.

Over the last couple of years I’ve really questioned. Growing up my mom told me that was normal. So I never  really thought anything of it. Until recently. Recently I’ve been questioning God a lot. *Why is there cancer? *Why would you take babies from their parents? *Why do little kids die? *Why do we die? *What is the point of life if all we do is die at the end of it. *Is there really a heaven? Or is there no such thing? *What if there’s no heaven? Then we just die? And there’s nothing after that? No afterlife? No heaven? No Pearly Gates? That’s depressing. But my biggest question is this… *God. Why won’t we have our family in heaven too? We may recognize them, but it won’t be the same. I have a lot of Mormon friends. And while I don’t agree with so many of their beliefs, I do know they believe their family on earth is going to be their family in heaven too. I like that. I don’t like the thought of not having my family in heaven. This thought hit me today. It all started with Mason’s new underpants. And before I knew it, I was crying. Thinking that I would only have him as my son on earth, but what about in heaven? What then? Will my kids not be my kids in heaven? Will they be just someone I recognize?

I can’t deny God. For me it’s impossible. I’ve had 4 babies. I’ve watched them grow in my stomach via ultrasound. Ive seen their tiny hearts beating from the time they were as small as a seed. I’ve felt their kicks and rolls. And I’ve birthed them. To have a child is to know God exists in my opinion. For me, that’s all the proof I’ve ever needed. But I still question. I still wonder why God allows things. Why He would do certain things. And while I’m being completely honest. I’m terrified of death. I am terrified of growing old. I am terrified of the rapture. I don’t read things like what I’m writing right now very often. But I needed to get it out. I feel consumed with emotion today and writing it down is how I’m processing some of these thoughts rolling in my mind.

I grew up hearing my mom talk about all of these things. And my whole life I’ve been afraid to die. My whole life I’ve been afraid of the rapture. It’s a hard thing for me to write this down. To wonder these things. This is how I feel today. And how i felt yesterday. And how I’ve felt for a while. Writing it down is the tricky part though, right? Exposing your deep dark thoughts. Making light that you’re really unsure about life. Sharing how scared you are. It’s hard to be vulnerable, but here I am. Here I stand… holding out all my thoughts. All of my questioning in one blog post. I may wear my heart on my sleeve… but deep thoughts like this are rarely admitted publicly.

I’m not searching for someone to tell me what to think, or what they think. I don’t need opinions, or judgement. I just simply wanted to write it down. Write down my feelings. My thoughts. Maybe …. just maybe I’m not alone in my questioning. Feel free to comment if you feel so compelled. But please leave the judgment and negativity at the “door”. Thank you.










February 15, 2015
by shealynn

Weaving Loom – a tutorial

So I’ve been seeing pictures of woven wall hangings all over Pinterest, Instagram and Facebook… I know they’re kinda 80’s, but I love them!  Every year for Christmas I try and find something for my older girls that will make them use the creative side of their minds.  I got Zoe a weaving kit and on Super Bowl Sunday she decided to give it a try.  But she was having such a hard time with it and honestly, I found it a bit complicated too.  So of course that made me turn to the internet and see if I could make homemade weaving loom.  And of course I could.  So, because my husband is amazing and almost always indulges me when I have an idea (haha!!), he went to Home Depot and bought the supplies I needed to make my own weaving loom to help Zoe weave.  Except I haven’t shown Zoe yet… LOL!  I will… I swear.  ;)  Anyway.  So I decided that I would share the how to with all of you incase one of you wants to make one too.  Promise to share if you do, okay?!  Seriously- this tutorial is so easy.  So, let’s get started!



—  1/2″ thick plywood.  Whatever dimension you want.  My husband got me 2’x2′.  But do whatever size you want.  I like the big board because I can make it smaller if I want without having to get more wood.  I will likely get smaller wood sometime, though.  ;)

— finishing nails

— hammer

— ruler

— spray paint (optional)


Start by measuring out and making 1cm marks across the top and bottom of your wood.


Then hammer in your finishing nails.  Make sure you don’t hammer them all the way through, though.  You just want them hammered in enough that they don’t move.  Notice how many marks are on my board… I messed up and had to redo mine.  Make sure you measure accurately.  ;)


Once you’re done hammering, then you can paint it like I did!  Or not.





I’m on a gold kick, so I primed my board and then painted it gold.








And now you’re ready to start weaving!!  How easy was that?!  Here’s how I started my weave…



Seriously love this craft, you guys!  And it’s so easy!  I can’t wait to start doing more complicated designs…



I can’t wait until it’s done and hanging on Brooke’s wall.  :)



I hope this tutorial came across clear and simple!  If you have any questions at all, please don’t hesitate to comment and ask!  I’m trying to get a tutorial up weekly, but sometimes life happens.  My kiddos needing me and stuff.  ;)  So, I’ll get them up as often as possible… how’s that?  haha!

Have a great Sunday!









January 30, 2015
by shealynn

Pom Pom Flowers – a tutorial

Here in Arizona we don’t really have winter.  I mean they call it winter, but it’s not really.  60-80 degrees during the day really is more like spring or fall to everyone else… including me.  ;)  Not that I’m complaining, because, honestly?  While most of the country is bundling up, shoveling snow, scraping ice off their windshields and just basically freezing, us Arizonians are out in short sleeves playing at the park, going for walks and drinking smoothies.  In January.  The point to all of this is that I thought it might be nice to share a tutorial that could brighten up your home during the rest of winter!  Sure, you could go to the store and buy real flowers to brighten things up… and you still can!  But why not add a bright bit of fun to your home that won’t eventually die?  :)  And thus, I give you the pom pom flowers!



Yarn (whatever color you prefer)

Hot Glue

Pom Pom Makers


Floral Wire



This is a seriously easy project.  And you’re going to want to make a million pom poms… so be ready to be obsessed!  haha!


Start by wrapping your yarn around your yarn maker… wrap and wrap and wrap.  Then switch to the other side and wrap and wrap and wrap.  Then fold in the yarn maker and cut in the middle.  (see pictures below)

Processed with Moldiv


Take a spare piece of yarn, wrap and tie the middle of the yarn maker.  Then take apart the yarn maker as shown on the yarn maker packaging.  Once your pom pom has been set free, trim it so it’s all uniform around.

Processed with Moldiv


Now go on and make a billion more…



Once you have the amount of pom poms you’d like, grab your sticks and/or your floral wire, and hot glue gun.


Now, I squirt (I hate that word but there’s no way around it) some hot glue on a piece of spare cardboard, paper towel etc and then dip the end of your stick or floral wire in the hot glue and push it into the pom pom.


Make sure you’re careful so you don’t get hot glue all over the pom pom.  You don’t want to see the hot glue.  And honestly?  THAT IS IT!


Takes literally minutes to make these!  But it’s so worth it, because look how happy they are!  Make extra and send them to a friend, your mom, grandma, aunt… or you can put them on a present to spiff it up!  Endless are the possibilities of the Pom Pom Flower!  :)





I hope this tutorial doesn’t seem silly.  But I just love these!  :D