Shey B

Throwing Those Egg Shells Out The Window

| 6 Comments

I’ve been thinking about blogging a lot lately.  I tend to do that before I write a blog post.  Ya know, think about what I want to write before I actually sit down at my computer.  I’ve had this feeling over the past week.  A feeling I’m not well acquainted with.  It’s caused me to really think about what I post on Twitter, Facebook or here on my blog.  Last night I got to thinking about this and realized that it’s time to kick this feeling to the curb.  That feeling is “walking on egg shells”.  I’ve never been the type to do this on my blog or any other online social media outlet.  But for over a week now, everything I’ve said on these sites has been taken, quoted and scrutinized.  And much of it has been taken out of context or made to sound like I’m targeting others, when in fact I’m actually not.  Let me give you an example.  Quotes.  I adore quotes and have for many many years.  In fact my favorite quote/sonnet is tattooed on my arm.  So it’s really no big thing for me to post several quotes I’ve happened to see on Facebook or Twitter.  I do it all the time and have for years.  So suddenly now I’m being told {yes told} that the quotes I’m posting are passive aggressive.  Really, now.  That’s interesting.

If you know me well, you know I’m not one to really be like that.  All seriousness aside, I like a good joke and I like to joke around with my online friends.  Inside jokes and all.  If I really wanted to say something I would just say it.  I don’t need to be passive aggressive to do so.

Here’s the thing I’ve noticed recently.  Most people have no guts until they get behind their safety net, which is their computer screen.  That’s when things really come out in full force.  Because people have no shame when it comes to typing up hateful things or untrue things but when it comes to actually approaching someone in person or on the phone, they just don’t have the guts to do it.  And then I get called unapproachable.  When in-fact I’m quite the opposite.  If I’m unapproachable to some, then they really haven’t taken the time to get to know me at all.

Last week I was on Twitter and happened to notice a tweet written about yours truly which said “she’s everything we were warned about”.  <— That has me wondering big time.  People are “warning” others about me?  I feel flattered to be people’s topic of conversation.  I however didn’t realize I should have come equipped with a warning label.  I should check into that.  Then I’ll have to check into what that label could possibly warn other’s about.  Because to be honest with you… I have no idea what that comment even means.  Warning: Shey is blunt.  True.  Warning: Shey is a no bull shit person.  Also true.  Warning: Shey is nice.  Yep.  This is true too.  Warning: Shey is sarcastic.  Ding ding ding TRUE!  Warning: Shey is {and I quote} “constantly intoxicated”.  <— Really?  That one had me doubled over laughing.  FALSE!  But really, a warning label really would save us all a lot of time, don’t you think?  We could list all of our personality traits on it.  That would make lives so much easier!  “Can I be friends with her?  I should read her warning label and find out!  Oh, nope… she’s a girlie girl, can’t be friends with her!”  This would be amazing don’t you think?  Judge people by what you hear/read instead of really getting to know them?  Oh wait… we already do that!  Just because someone, like me, doesn’t have a bubbly personality doesn’t mean they’re unapproachable.  It means just that… I do not have a bubbly personality.  Oh and did you happen to know I’m an introvert?  Yeah, so there’s that too.  I wrote an entire post about it too!  You can see that HERE.

So you know, last week I wrote a post about my dad being diagnosed and cured of cancer recently.  It was a raw post about my feelings about what I thought as I heard the news, etc.  You know you’re a true hater when you actually post a comment on someone’s blog and negatively comment on a post like that.  Not sure who people think they are, but even for haters, that’s just wrong.  Is there a handbook for haters?  Because I’m pretty sure the one and only rule in that book would have something against it. And did you know an IP address can be tracked?  Even if you put the wrong email address.  You can be found out even if you’re anonymous.  Darn those pesky IP addresses.  It’s a good thing I have better things to do and I’m not psychotic.

What is the point of my blog post?  I’m throwing those egg shells out the window.  My blog has always been my space that I can come to and write about whatever I want to.  So you know what?  Scrutinize away!  This is MY SPACE. I can write whatever I’m feeling, doing, laughing about, crying about, etc on my own blog.  If someone has a problem with it… that’s their problem.  <— oh look!  There I go being blunt.  Point is… I’m tired of feeling like I have to walk on eggs shells when all I want to do it write out what I’m feeling.  And I can do that and I should be able to do that.  So should you!  This makes me wonder how many haters are going to come out to play today.  Remember … IP addresses.  Enough said.

All sarcasm, bluntness and joking aside, let me be real…

One thing I have realized over the past week is how easily people fall prey to the reactions of others.  How easily human beings are  swayed to believe what one person says.  And instead of looking at things with a clear mind, hatred takes hold and attacks begin.  Something else I’ve learned is that when someone decides to take the high road and not say anything, that brings forth more hatred.  I guess I kinda figure at a certain point there is just no point in saying anything, because the damage has already been done.  The words have already been written.  And these words brought  other’s together and instead of commenting about those certain words, hatred began bubbling over like poison.  Infecting not only who it was meant for, but everyone around them.  Soon, the poison had been spewed by thousands… it was spreading like wild fire and infecting any online outlet it could get to.  Because you see… when the hatred starts, when the bullying starts, it affects more than that one person you’re intending to affect.  It affects everyone around you, everyone around your target.  Hatred, drama, bullying … all three are like a cancer.  Left to eat away at everyone around you until there’s nothing left.

At some point there’s a realization of how far people will go with the hatred & bullying.  Threats, hate mail, comments on my blog telling me my dad’s cancer is just an excuse or something I made up.  Yet the high road is where I stay.  I hurt, I cry, I get angry, but I say nothing.  Because honestly… enough has already been said, don’t you think?  Why don’t I defend myself?  Well, I normally would. {i kinda did above}  Except, I don’t really need to.  Because I KNOW THE TRUTH.  And the truth I know is SO MUCH DIFFERENT than what other’s THINK they know.  What other’s ASSUME they know.  What other’s GOSSIP about because someone told them they know.  I am NONE of the things people are calling me.  Trash, a fraud, a bitch, stupid, “constantly intoxicated”, etc etc etc.  Those are just words.  Hurtful, of course, but only words.

I choose and will always choose to take the high road.  To RISE ABOVE.  To turn the other cheek.  Because I know who I am.  If you’re sure you know me, it’s more than likely you don’t.

 

And… there go the egg shells!

 

Be nice to each other people.  Treat others with respect and love, not hatred and bullying.  And if you choose to take the high road, good for you! 

 

xoxo,

6 Comments

  1. I love that you have the balls to stand up for yourself! Go you and I think you should keep blogging. Even if it is only once a month for a whats on your mind kinda thing. That way I can keep up with you! And its to bad we don’t live closer, I’m sure we could cause a lot of trouble together. ;)

  2. Why do people have to create such drama? It is so exhausting. It is why I love the quote, “SAVE THE DRAMA FOR YOUR MAMA.” I have no idea where it came from so if anyone wants to gripe to me, just kiss my grits.

  3. I am totally clueless about all of this…and it doesn’t matter. I enjoy reading blogs, and YES happy stuff, sad stuff, what your thinking kind of stuff. I don’t usually even comment, just enjoy reading. Whatever you decide is great. But know this…I enjoy reading your blog, AND have purchased your camera straps. VERY nice stuff! Everyone always ask’s. “Where did you get that camera strap!”

    Ignore the bad stuff…LIFE is way to short:) Happy Weekend!!!

  4. It’s so sad that you are the target of some serious bullshit. I’m guessing you are a bit younger than I am and let me just say that when you get to be 40 you will be so happy you spent your 20’s and 30’s speaking your mind and staying true to yourself the way it seems that you do. I will say you are a lot stronger than I am to be handling the hateful crap as well as you are. I cannot imagine that people are saying those things about you. Seriously people? Get a life, take care of your own kids, marriage, homes….

    I’m glad your dad is doing well. My dad just finished chemo and had a major surgery and is cancer free. His sickness made me think about the blogging world. I’m not so sure I want to keep going. We will see. I do love reading your posts. Thanks for keeping it real.

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