Let me be real with you all.
I don’t particularly care for being pregnant. Much to my relief, I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. I just don’t feel a “glow”. I don’t enjoy the aches, the pains, or being uncomfortable. I don’t enjoy the raging horrific heartburn I get that feels like my entire chest is being set on fire. I could get into great detail about the many other things I don’t like about being pregnant, but I won’t go there. Of all of these things, I think the biggest thing I don’t like about pregnancy is my particular body during the whole thing. Don’t get me wrong. I love this little boy growing inside me just as I loved my girls when I was pregnant with them. But I’m incredibly self conscious when I’m not pregnant, and when I am pregnant, multiply that by 1,000. I’m truly uncomfortable in my own skin. I hate looking in the mirror, I HATE being weighed, I hate how fat I feel and look when I’m pregnant.
Lately tons of people I know in real life and online are pregnant or just recently had babies. Most of them it’s their first or second time around and they’ve all (almost) talked about how much they love being pregnant. They love their growing belly and dressing cute, etc etc. That is so most definitely NOT me. haha!
I always gain a lot of weight during my pregnancies. I’ve already gained too much with this pregnancy! I lost so much weight last year and now I’m gaining it back. It’s something I’ve always struggled with (my weight) and lately I’m either obsessing over how much weight I’ve gained or what I’m eating/not eating/shouldn’t be eating. And this scares me because the last thing I ever want to be is obsessed with this kind of thing. I do believe that pregnancy should be a joy (at least to an extent) you are carrying a BABY after all!
This Wednesday my kids go back to school. They’ve been tracked out for the past 3 weeks. When they start school Vlad and I’ll be headed off to the park to walk a couple miles. EVERY day. That’s the one thing lacking in this pregnancy that I got plenty of during my pregnancy with Zoe. Exercise. So I’m going to walk and this weekend I may go buy some small 3-5 pound hand weights as well. I live in a teeny neighborhood so I have to actually drive to walk, but I’m ok with that. The weather here is awesome and walking is something I like doing. In Arizona I never wanted to go outside because it’s just too hot in the late Spring and Summer, and while being pregnant? Forget it!
So, that’s my plan. I’m eating healthy and have an occasional “bad snack” or dessert, but I seriously gain 2-3 pounds just from eating dessert one time. NO joke. I’ve always joked that pregnancy is a weight gain curse for me, but it’s true. I’m eating healthier now than I have my entire life and I’m still gaining loads of weight. Good thing being pregnant is only temporary and I’ll be able to really diet/watch what I eat once our little son is here.
I can say that one thing I do love about being pregnant is feeling the baby move. It’s my most favorite thing in the world. A reminder that a tiny human is in my belly and I’ll get to meet him in 4.5 months. :) And once I’m holding my son it’ll all be worth it, I know it.
So for all of you out there that don’t enjoy being pregnant, you’re not alone. And I don’t think it’s something to feel guilty about. I certainly don’t. Some women feel like they were born to be pregnant or they love the glow they get or they love their growing belly or they love “dressing the bump”. I am NOT one of those woman. We’re all different, right? ;)
So, pipe up! Is pregnancy the best thing in the world for you or are you like me?